Our Abby

Sincere Thanks and Goals for 2012

2011-12-26T19:35:00.000-05:00

Last March, we dropped off one hundred Care Bags to Jefferson's Intensive Care Nursery-- bags full of soft blankets, books, reusable water bottles, hand sanitizer, tissues, and more. To say it was a dream come true is an understatement. It felt amazing to pass along even a tiny fraction of the love and care we received during our 2-month stay in that very place just three years ago.

As I handed over the bags, Abby played with toys in the waiting room... the same waiting room our family used to bide our time during shift changes and procedures. The same room my mom would sit in for hours on end until it was her turn to hold Abby. The same room we'd wait for news after exams by various doctors and specialists. It was surreal to be there again with a healthy Abby, and even as she played I saw families come in who were just beginning the same journey-- and it gave me peace to know they'd be comforted by the bags you all helped put together.

I tried not to cry as a warmer rolled by, the baby bagged and the nurses working intently to save that child.

Not sure I succeeded holding the tears back, not gonna lie!

It was amazing to meet other ICN moms, with miracle babies (like baby G, seen here) as well:

And boy did that little guy have the most kissable cheeks I've ever seen. He was a rockstar former patient, much loved by all the staff!

We managed to wrangle Nurse Jane away from her duties {and hilarious Facebook updates} for a photo too:

Thank you all for making this possible. For your donations, your time, your positive energy-- it was appreciated by us, and by the families as well.

After 3 years of fundraising, working with vendors, collecting donations, writing letters, and packing bags I can happily check "Donate 100 Care Bags" off the 2011 to-do list.

Which may leave you wondering,

"So, what's in store for Team Abby in 2012?"

I wish more than anything I had the energy and time to pull together another 100 bags this year. However, it cost several thousand dollars and countless hours to make it all happen. If we had the thousands of dollars in hand, there's no doubt I'd be able to find the countless hours. But so many of those hours would need to be spent fundraising, and my two little kiddos (affectionately named The Danger Twins, due to their closeness of age and ability to pull off acts Houdini would envy) keep me running from the crack of dawn until... well, truthfully, to the crack of dawn again due to Abby's sleep issues.

my proud helper with our folders and notebooks for the Care Bags

But don't fret, Team Abby is still alive and well, and very busy! I may not be able to fundraise enough for 100 full Care Bags this year, but I pledge Team Abby will donate 100 blankets and books to Jefferson's ICN in 2012. While the entire bag is so important to give, the blankets and books are really the heart of it all. We have a great start with about 50 of each already, so I should be able to purchase and/or gather 50 more blankets and 50 more books for those special, special babies.

I've also been connecting with current Jefferson families during "meet and greets" with pizza and a chance to sit down and chat about Abby's journey and offer help as a former parent and one who has dealt with private nursing/ feeding clinics/ medical supplies, etc. I never visit empty handed-- I make sure to bring the loveys, books, and blankets donated by you and they are always gratefully accepted by the parents.

What gives me great hope that we'll be able to donate our goal of 100 books and blankets in 2012 is that {with very little effort on my part} we've received several recent generous donations. These gifts help offset operating costs and will allow me to stock up on blankets and books when I see them on sale. It's not enough to pay for the 50 of each needed, but the year is young so I have hope it will happen!

We might do a some fundraising here and there, but nothing like what I hope to pull off in the future... oh yes, my wheels are turning! Sooner or later The Danger Twins will be in school and I can put more energy into planning and pulling off some of the ideas I have rumbling around in this brain of mine.

Abby, an hour old and before head cooling

Until then, THANK YOU for all you've done. We are, as always, still accepting donations of money, blankets, and books {see the "DONATE" tab above}. If you have questions or extra time on your hands and wish to fundraise for us, don't hesitate to get in touch!

Much love and blessings to you all, and please accept our deepest gratitude for all you've done to help comfort sick babies and their families as they navigate this difficult journey.

I can't wait to visit that waiting room again with Abby, bearing more Care Bags. Here's hoping it's sooner than later! Cheers to a beautiful and healthy 2012, friends!

Care Bag Party

2011-02-12T23:07:00.000-05:00

Last weekend a few friends of Team Abby gathered to help pack the bags.

We rolled blankets...

Aren't these Aden + Anais blankets amazing?

We stuffed folders.

We had an assembly line of goodies:

And in the end, we had this:

{plus about 30 more that wouldn't fit in the photos}

The Helpers:

Oh, and a few of us went to college together. Here we are, not looking a day over 21-- HA!

Ms. Abby loved the attention.

We have about 30 bags ready to go, 40 more waiting for just stuffed animals, and 30 more waiting for stuffed animals and books. If you have any new stuffed animals and/or books for babies, we'd love to add them to the rest of the bags!

board books

"loveys" waiting to do their job!

Many, many thanks to all those who helped. All those hands made the work go quickly {and, dare I say, it was kinda fun?} XOXO!

GUIDE- How To Help A NICU Family

2011-02-12T22:08:00.000-05:00

Here are some things that helped us get through the two months Abby spent in the NICU. Please remember that every family has a different experience and these are things that helped us-- but may be different for the family you want to reach out to.

MEALS

During our NICU stay, we ate dinners near the hospital so gift cards to local restaurants were immensely helpful.
A friend sent us a fruit bouquet, and since we were at home in the mornings it was great to have that fresh fruit already cut so I could grab a few pieces on the way out the door.
Another friend sent us a box full of nutrition bars like Zone bars, granola bars, etc. Again, this "grab and go" type food was a lifesaver because I could eat it on the train or the way into the hospital. Once in the NICU, food was not allowed so often this was the only food I would eat until they kicked us out for rounds at 7PM.
We had many offers of dinner drop-offs, and once Abby came home that was incredibly helpful. It's especially wonderful if you have someone coordinating the meals so the family doesn't have to worry about it. Sites like mealtrain.com help concerned friends and family organize dinner drop-offs.

VISITS FROM FAMILY/FRIENDS

This will vary widely by family, but for us hospital visits from friends could be difficult because only two people were allowed in the room at one time. That meant one of the parents had to leave while someone visited. Sometimes having a visitor was helpful, like when we needed a break and didn't want to leave Abby alone. Also, when my husband had to go to work and I was in there by myself the time passed very slowly and it was helpful to have a friend. Please be considerate and ask the family if they are accepting visits at that time, and/or let them know you'd love to visit if they would like companionship. Showing up unexpectedly might put stress on the family, no matter how much they love you. Again, this varies from family to family and even with the visitor so just be sure to ask before visiting.

GETTING UPDATES

We used Carepages.com to communicate with our circle of support. This allowed us to focus on Abby and not an endless list of phones calls and emails to answer. We LOVED the messages of support we received via phone, email, Carepage message, etc.-- just know that your NICU family may not be able to respond back right away.

GIVING GIFTS

Again, we were overwhelmed with the amount of support we received. People donated cash and gift cards to help with the expenses. Both were extremely helpful in alleviating the financial burden of such a stay. Parking and fast dinners alone cost over $2,000 for the 50 days Abby was in the NICU. One of the hardest parts of being on the receiving end was that I often did not even have a free minute to respond back. It weighed heavily on me, but every spare moment was spent sleeping because we were so exhausted from the travel, visits, worry, doctors, appointments, insurance companies, etc. Please be understanding if the family doesn't acknowledge the gift right away. It took an average of 6 months to a year for me to get some thank-yous out!!!

Along those lines, Care Bags are available for purchase if you would like to send one to a NICU family. Care Bags cost $25 each, plus shipping. See this page to find out what's in a Care Bag, and email me if interested and we can get one mailed as soon as possible!

You're Invited!

2011-01-23T22:24:00.021-05:00

It's a "Pack the Care Bags" Party

When: February 6th, 2PM (a pre-Superbowl gathering)

Where: at our home in East Norriton, PA

RSVP on our Facebook event page

(once you RSVP "yes" I'll email our address and directions)

There will be lots of snacks and beverages. We'll be done in plenty of time for you to get home and catch the game, or stay here and watch it admist the bags.

Feel free to get in touch with questions or if you would like to donate food for the event or additional Care Bag supplies (we still need more blankets and books). Hope to see you there!

Corporate Sponsors

2010-07-18T00:43:00.000-04:00

We are currently a grassroots organization, growing with the help of some lovely and generous friends. Help us grow even more by becoming a corporate sponsor!

Who is eligible?
Any business that wants exposure in our print and online publications, as well as our social media connections.

How does it work?
There are several levels of sponsorship. Choose the level that is right for your business:

advertising: our rate is $10 a month, or $100 for 12 months pre-paid. For this fee, your ad (with active link) will be displayed at the top of our sidebar for all to see! If you choose the $100 a year option, we'll include your logo in our print media including our yearly press kit and the brochure that is included in all Care Bags. We'll also be sure to promote you via our Facebook page.

donations: anyone donating $100 or more in products or services gets free advertising space for a year at the top of our website's sidebar, as well as a logo in our print media (including our press kit and pamphlets included in each Care Bag). We'll also give you a shout-out on our Facebook page! Email us if you would like a list of services and/or products that we need.

Note: There is a $10 one-time fee if you need us to make a button for your ad. You are free to submit your own logo and button, no fee attached!

We love our corporate sponsors and are happy to discuss the above options or other ideas you may have. Email us with any questions!

Two Years Ago Today

2010-07-03T01:14:00.001-04:00

Two years ago today we had the best and worst day of our lives.

Two years ago today, I felt a "snap" and heard my daughter's heart rate drop off the monitor during a routine induction.

Two years ago today, as nurses frantically inserted an IV and pushed my bed down the hall to the OR, I prayed the hardest I have ever prayed in my entire life.

Two years ago today, I delivered my daughter in the scariest fashion imaginable.

Two years ago today, I learned that nurses are heroes.

Abby, just moments after being resuscitated

Two years and one day from this moment, I met my daughter for the first time-- covered in wires, head wrapped in a cooling cap, and tube helping her breathe.

We were told she wouldn't make it.

We were told to expect the worst.

We were told that even if she did make it through that first week, we were not out of the woods and would probably need to decide to either take her off life support or be parents to a daughter in a vegetative state.

She was baptized in my arms. It took two nurses and a respiratory tech to get her there. It was the first time I would hold her, at four days old, and the last time I'd hold her for awhile.

That week, we watched our sweet girl double in size as fluid filled her tiny body, unable to get rid of it because her kidneys had failed.

I prayed the second hardest I ever had; this time I prayed she would pee.

We ALL prayed she would pee.

And then... she did.

That was the second happiest day of our lives, despite the fact the EEG showed little brain activity.

We hated that EEG.

Then came the moment of truth-- they weaned her off her seizure meds to see if her brain would wake up.

We waited and waited to see what damage almost an hour without air had done to her baby brain.

She opened her eyes.

She looked at her daddy.

Even with the doctors saying they still weren't sure if she would make it, and that she'd probably have significant brain damage, she tried to show us otherwise.

We should have listened to that little one, trying to tell us she'd be okay.

50 days after she was born, we finally took our baby home from the hospital.

So each 4th of July, when we see fireworks, we remember our own little firecracker. And we remember to never, ever, ever, ever, EVER give up...

...or take life for granted...

...or say "no" when someone offers help...

...or forget that God does listen...

{just like those little bitty babies, even when we think they can't hear}.

Happy birthday, dear Abby. You continue to amaze and inspire all who meet you every day. In the words of your doctor, no pressure, but there's a reason you are here. We expect great things from you, as you've already pulled off what most said was impossible.

Abby in front of the NICU where she spent her first hours of life

Just remind me of this little story the next time you hit your brother or throw a tantrum because you want to stay outside, you little stinker. ;-) You are two now, you know.

A Buying Guide for Care Bag Donations

2010-06-28T22:48:00.002-04:00

Due to popular demand, here's what we're looking for in terms of donated items.

Want to stretch your donation even further? If you purchase items through the links on this page (they lead to Amazon.com), Team Abby will earn a percentage! You can also find these items (and so many more) in our Team Abby Amazon Store-- we'll earn money if you buy through our store, too. We love donated items from any source, so don't feel like you have to purchase through Amazon. Thanks for helping wrap our babies in love!

Edited to add: I recently found cute but cheap receiving blankets at Marshalls, Big Lots, and T.J.Maxx for under $6 for a pack of 5!

Blankets

We need blankets that can be used for swaddling babies and to be used as bedding in cribs.

thin, flannel style receiving blankets work best
blankets can be new with tags or like new (in great condition)
crocheted and knit are welcomed too, especially if handmade
they don't need to be expensive, just cute and comfy
neutral colors are appreciated, but we'll also have bags by gender so send along your blues and pinks as well

Examples:

Carter's 4 Pack Recieving Multi-dot Blankets

Luvable Friends 6-Pack Flannel Receiving Blankets, Pink

Gerber Flannel Receiving Blanket, 5 Pack, Neutral

Carters Wrap Me Up Receiving Blanket, 4 Pack, Pink/Choc

How they will be used:

Books:

It's a helpless feeling when you can't hold your own child. Reading books aloud gave us something to do as well as soothed Abby with the sound of our voices. Today she's an avid "reader"!

board books are best (sturdy pages to withstand years of abuse by kiddos!)
should be good read-alouds (avoid wordless, "lift the flap", and "touch and feel books" that are difficult to read aloud)
books can be new or in "like new" condition

Here's a list of favorite titles; feel free to add your own:

Goodnight Moon
The Very Hungry Caterpillar's Favorite Words (The World of Eric Carle)
Ve, Perro. Ve!: Go, Dog. Go! (Bright & Early Board Books(TM)) (Spanish Edition)
But Not the Hippopotamus
The Going-To-Bed Book
Moo Baa La La La
Blue Hat, Green Hat Barnyard Dance! (Boynton on Board)
Hippos Go Berserk
Jamberry
Good Night, Gorilla
Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?
Baby Bear, Baby Bear, What Do You See? Board Book (Brown Bear and Friends)
Brown Bear & Friends Board Book Gift Set
Gossie and Gertie
I Love You, Little One
Guess How Much I Love You
Mr. Brown Can Moo, Can You : Dr. Seuss's Book of Wonderful Noises (Bright and Early Board Books)
Counting Kisses: A Kiss & Read Book

How The Books Will Be Used:

Here's our little bookworm post-NICU:

Loveys and Stuffed Animals

for sanitary reasons, loveys and stuffed animals need to be new
they should be small enough to fit in a Care Bag, but large enough not to be a choking hazard
we'd love handmade creations
they don't need to be expensive, just baby-friendly!

Examples:

Angel Dear 14" x 14" Blankie in Brown Monkey

Mary Meyer Blanket and Toy, Precious Puppy

Baby Gund Lamb "Winky White"

Bear Security Blanket, Blue

How They Will Be Used

Pink Bunny cuddled with Abby all 50 days of her NICU stay

These sweet handmade birdies helped out, too!

You can't see it in the photo, but this lion gave Abby her first laugh!

Other items we'd love to have:

crib-mounted mobiles: Tiny Love Classic Mobile, Tiny Love Sweet Island Dreams Mobile

pumping bras: Easy Expression Halter Hands Free Pumping Bra (Medium)

gift cards to Cosi, PotBelly, Au Bon Pain, Starbucks, Dunkin Donuts (all are located near the hospital)

voice recorders (parents can record their voice and leave it with their baby): Sony ICD-BX700 Digital Voice Recorder with Stereo Microphone Jack

Thanks for your support!

We Have a Winner!

2010-06-27T15:57:00.000-04:00

Thanks to all who voted for which web design they liked best in our Facebook poll. I appreciate all the input, as I wanted to be sure that this will be an attractive and user-friendly site.

So, without further ado, you are looking at the NEW and IMPROVED Team Abby site! I still have several tweaks to make, such as adding a Paypal widget, adding content to the navigation tabs, and linking to our Amazon Associates program (which raises money for Team Abby)... but, those will come soon. For now, enjoy the fresh look of our site and spread the word about our important cause!

Also, by popular request, I do have a post coming on what types of blankets, books, and loveys we are looking for. It's almost ready to post, and I should have it done very soon!

Pardon the dust...

2010-04-30T01:38:00.000-04:00

... but we're busy getting lots done over here! Forgive the sloppy appearance of the site but it's currently under construction. We hope to roll out the new design in a few weeks, thanks to a fab web designer that I'm working with. Here's a peek behind the scenes of what we've been doing:

* working with Sire Advertising on our bags and reusable bottles. Woo-hoo!

* a new email address: teamabbyfoundation@gmail.com

* a new mailing address:
        Team Abby Foundation
        P.O. Box 459
        Worcester, PA 19490-0459

* giving the website a fresh and clean look, with easy-to-navigate tabs

* a Facebook page

* a Paypal widget (to be added soon-- I'm working on this) to make donations easier

* Gifts from the Heart program-- add Team Abby to your celebration by requesting gifts of blankets, loveys, and board books at your next baby shower, birthday party, or other special event. We can even provide the cards to add to your invites to make this VERY easy to do!

Feel free to drop me a note at our NEW email address, or check out our Facebook page to see other ways to help get these Care Bags into the ICN at Jefferson.

Announcing: The Team Abby Care Bags!

2010-02-14T00:20:00.011-05:00

Yippee! I'm thrilled to announce that the project I've been cooking up for TEAM ABBY was approved by Jefferson Hospital. We still have many steps to take before we see it come to fruition, but this was the first hurdle and it seems as if we've cleared it!

Our goal is to create a sustainable program to supply long-term Intensive Care Nursery (ICN) families with a TEAM ABBY Care Bag upon arrival. This bag will be filled with items that are needed for the difficult months ahead, as well as comfort items to ease the way. As we found out, often times when your child is admitted to the ICN it is an emergency and not something you planned for. We were suddenly dumped into a situation where I was recovering from major surgery (a c-section) and we were far from home. As the weeks wore on, we didn't have any time to find or buy certain items that would have been very helpful to have. Care Bags can help ease that transition. I've been brainstorming ideas of items to include, and came up with the following:

zippered tote (with TEAM ABBY logo)
notebook/pen
reusable water bottle (with TEAM ABBY logo)
tissues
hand sanitizer
hand lotion
gift cards to local eateries
a "welcome" packet with helpful numbers, websites, and ideas
lip balm
baby blanket (to brighten up the crib)
board book (for families to read to their baby when there are no words to say)
a "lovey" (to watch over the little one)

A pink crocheted blanket cuddled Abby when we couldn't...

As this program grows, I hope to also lend (free of charge, of course) larger-ticket items for use in the ICN. These include things like a hand-held tape recorder (for recording your voice so the nurses can play it back when you are gone), a "womb bear", and a mobile for comfort and visual stimulation.

Abby's "lovey" keeps her warm and watches over her

My goal is to have the first batch of bags ready by the first of next year. That isn't much time when you consider all that needs to be done-- fundraising, printing, buying, packing, and distributing. This needs to be sustainable, so it's not a "one and done" process, which means proper planning is imperative!

How can you help?
Aside from monetary donations (which are always appreciated, just email me if interested until I can get an online widget up and running) there are many ways to help. First, does anyone know a screen printer who can give us a great rate on the tote bags and water bottles? Second, if you happen to be out and about and want to purchase new blankets, loveys or board books feel free to do so. You can send them to me and I'll make sure they are added to a bag. Third, let me know if you have any fundraising ideas. I do eventually want to make this an official non-profit but right now I'd like to get bags into the hands that need them. I need some easy/great fundraising ideas if you have any!
Thanks for the support, and I hope you love the Care Bags idea as much as I do. If you are a NICU parent (current or former), please comment or email with ideas of things we can add to the bags or our "lending library". I could use some additional insight.

Next Post: Care Bag Timeline (WHAT needs to be done, and by WHEN)

And the winner is...

2009-10-21T21:53:00.005-04:00

While both logos got a positive response, one seemed to touch everyone's hearts. As you can probably guess, the winner was:

Thanks so much, again, to Janis of NavyBean for her amazing logo skills. And thanks to Erin for setting us up! She knew Janis would be able to come up with something amazing for us. Thanks to you both, as well as those who voted! Now, onto the next action item... getting the website up and running to support our upcoming projects!

Please VOTE on our new logo!

2009-09-19T21:50:00.006-04:00

I'm SO EXCITED to show off two logo designs by Janis from Navy Bean. Janis did an amazing job creating two logos that I love, so I need your help to choose the one that will become our official logo!

Take a peek at the two logos below, and leave a comment telling me which is your favorite. We hope that this will become part of our "brand"-- letterheads, t-shirts, promo materials, etc. Without further ado, here they are!

A:

B:

Aren't they AMAZING?!? Okay, time to vote below! Let me know which one you think should be our logo. I'll announce the winning design in about a week!

Favorite Things

2009-07-31T13:55:00.003-04:00

About a month before Abby was born, a package arrived in the mail from my friend Kristy. It contained a bunch of things she and her newborn daughter found helpful... which was a lifesaver for a clueless mom-to-be! I recently ~~stole~~ borrowed this idea and sent my first “Favorite Things” package to a friend who is expecting her first.

I started thinking about all those products that got me through the long days as a mother of a newborn, specifically one with special needs. There are several things that I simply could not have gotten through this experience without. I want to share them as well as solicit other ideas and come up with a guide for new parents, parents of special needs children, and also reflux parents. Below is my list of “Favorite Things”, with hyperlinked titles that will take you to the product's page. All are marked with the following abbreviations to denote the targeted audience:

*= all-around all-star (great for ALL parents!)
RE= helpful for a reflux baby
SN= helpful for a special needs baby

What are your "Favorite Things?" Don’t forget to add them in the comments section! Remember, even something that seems simple can be the thing that changes someone's life for the better. Don't believe me? Read below!

The BASICS:

Boppy (*)

Is there a better pillow than the Boppy? Every new mom I know has one. There are many uses for it, but we use it to keep Abby elevated after a feed while she sleeps. Yes, this requires constant monitoring (a child should NEVER sleep unsupervised on a Boppy) but it gives her that 30 degree angle to help control her reflux. She’s slept on it every single night since we’ve gotten home from the hospital. We also used it IN the hospital when we held her since the chairs they had were very uncomfortable and provided little support. Boppy, we lurve you!

Noggin Nest (SN)
Abby demonstrates the RIGHT way to use the Noggin Nest...

... and the WRONG way to use the Noggin Nest!

Another AMAZING product from Boppy. I used this for several reasons. First, I was worried about Abby’s head shape due to the amount of time she spent on her back and in her feeding chair. I didn’t want her to have a flat head on top of all the other issues we were dealing with. Additionally, Abby was considered “floppy” (low-tone) and it took a little longer than most to get that needed head control. The Noggin Nest kept her head from flopping all over the place. Trust me when I tell you reflux babies can contort their heads in the most grotesque fashion—the Noggin Nest kept that in check. We used it in her chair to keep her head from flopping, and you should see how round and pretty her head shape is now

Bundle Me (*)

Oh, wow, my life CHANGED once I discovered the Bundle Me! I didn’t understand why I needed it at first and then watched as friend after friend visited with their babies snuggled in the Bundle Me. Once we bought one, it cut about 10 minutes of our getting-ready-to-leave time! The Bundle Me fits inside the seat and and goes under and over the baby’s body. There are slots for the car seat straps to fit through, and is lined with warm fleece. It’s so warm, in fact, that a jacket is not needed. Please note that it is generally not regarded as safe to have extra things in the carseat, but in my opinion (I am no expert) having the thin Bundle Me is better than a super puffy jacket that prevents the straps from holding tightly. On that note, Abby is NOT wearing the straps correctly in the lower photo. I took the photo before I adjusted latch to her armpit height and pulled the straps tighter. Important stuff!

Fisher Price Infant/Toddler Rocker (*)

I received this as a shower gift, and it really came in handy! Abby loved the toys on the toy bar. In fact, we’d often bring the singing cow (we named him “Mike”) on trips to the doctor’s office because it entertained her while we waited. We also used him to distract her while we placed the NG tube, so I’m pretty sure she’ll end up having some sort of fear of cows, but we did what we had to. Anyways, the chair grows with your child, first as a vibrating seat for infants and then turns into a rocker for toddlers. Paired with the Noggin Nest, she was tube fed in this every single day until she learned to crawl. We’ll have this with us for years to come!

Graco Pack and Play (the pimped out version!) (*)

There are so many different types of Pack and Plays on the market. What makes this one stand out are the special buttons on the side. Abby slept in the P&P in our room for the first few months after leaving the hospital, and we would run her nightly and first morning feeds in it. If she woke up in the middle of a feed, she’d often throw up. This amazing P&P has vibration and music buttons, helping her to drift off to sleep again. Words cannot describe the level of exhaustion I had reached after 2 months of NICU visits, major surgery, and getting about 4 hours of sleep a night (and pumping during her naps, making napping (for me) impossible). The soothing buttons allowed both of us to get much needed rest and let Abby heal and feed without constantly waking up. Now that she’s bigger, we’ve taken the top layer off and use it as a playpen. It's wonderful.

SwaddleMe (*)

I know, you can just use a large blanket. But these are pretty great, keeping Abby snug and hands-free (no tube pulling!) while sleeping. It took awhile before our little Houdini could get out of them. SUPER helpful in terms of keeping her hands out of the way when we placed her NG tube. I wish they made a toddler version!

Gerber Pre-fold Cloth Diapers (a.k.a.: burp cloths!) (RE)

When you have a child that throws up massive amounts of liquid, you need something within reach that will absorb it. Enter good old Gerber pre-folded cloth diapers. These babies absorb ANYTHING, and quickly, and are cheap to boot. I bought them by the dozen, and put them all over the house so we were ready. They saved many a couch, bed, and outfit. Seriously, they absorb an entire bottle’s worth of liquid. BY FAR they are one of the highest on my list of things I love!

Peanut Shell baby sling (*)
Correct way to use the sling (but hard to get a good self-photo):

INCORRECT way to use the sling (but oh-so-snuggly when you take it off while baby sleeps!):

I bought the sling right before Abby was born, and actually didn't use it for months. One day, I simply needed to clean and Abby wouldn't let me put her down. In frustration, I placed her in the sling on me and proceeded to clean. Guess what? Not only did she love it, but she started snoozing almost immediately. This became a LIFESAVER when I needed to get her to sleep to feed her. Granted, it has become somewhat of a crutch and now we are weaning her off of it, but it saved my sanity FOR SURE. The only warning is that you need to be careful with a reflux baby and a carrier because if you curl them up too much after a feed then they can throw up. That only happened once or twice, though-- knock on wood!

Duoderm (SN)

Abby developed a terrible rash where the tube and tape met her skin. We got away with about 6 months of no rashes, but then, BOOM: rash. We treated the rash with hydrocortisone cream, and used Duoderm as a barrier. Here's the process: first, apply skin prep. Next, the duoderm. Then place the NG tube, lay it flat over the duoderm, and place the tape on top. An NG sandwich, if you will. Sounds easy, right? HA HA HA HAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!!!!!!

Salter Baby Scale (SN)

We finally folded and just bought our own scale. When your baby is labeled "failure to thrive", you'll do just about anything. Honestly, it was a great investment. It was great to be able to keep track of Abby's weight at home. It saved us from hours of doctor visits for "weight checks". It allowed us to see what was working and what wasn't, feeding wise. It gave me the data I needed to yell at our nursing agency: "she's lost half a pound this week because we haven't had consistent nurses!!!!" Ah, yes, I love the Salter Baby Scale.

Woolite Pet Oxygen Carpet Cleaner (RE)

Yes, it’s formulated for animal messes but it has such a clean scent we used it on many an Abby mess. We will eventually need to replace the carpets in our living room and her nursery due to the amount she refluxed, but until we can afford it this spray keeps us as fresh as can be expected when you have a child that projectile vomits several times a day. (So, WHY don’t you want to come visit us???)

Munchkin Inflatable Duck Tub (*)

We thought the world of Abby’s infant tub until she learned to sit up unassisted. We still couldn’t give her baths sitting in the big tub because on occasion she’s just flop backwards without warning. That was another brain injury waiting to happen! Enter the Duck Tub, which I found new at a consignment shop for $7. It was easy to inflate, easy to clean, safe for floppers, AND it quacks! What more could you ask for? It’s also great for traveling, not that we’d know because we didn’t really go anywhere.

Changing Table Wedge (RE)
Photo was taken from the Pollywog website... our cover is a little bit cuter. :-)

Here’s a conundrum: let’s say you have a baby that gets frequent UTI’s, has horrible reflux, and needs to be elevated during and after each feed or else she’ll throw up. Okay, now put that baby on a feeding pump and watch as she poops mid-feed. You now have a poopy reflux baby that needs to be changed or else she’ll get a UTI but you can’t lay her flat or she’ll puke up her entire feed. WELCOME TO MY WORLD!!!!!!! Enter the reflux wedge. It goes under the changing pad to keep it at an angle. Before we bought this, Abby would throw up each time we changed her. After we bought it, she would still throw up sometimes but the chances of NOT throwing up certainly improved. It does make it tricky to change her at an angle, but no trickier than trying to keep her elevated, change a diaper, and then dodge the puke without the wedge. This changed our lives! (by the way, the site we ordered it from is an excellent resource for Reflux Mamas!)

Clothing:

Baby Legs (*)(RE)

These aren't your mama's legwarmers! Nope, Baby Legs actually make sense, as opposed to the slouchy knitted monstrosities we sported in the eighties. GREAT for a reflux baby, this allows the baby to wear a onesie with none of those belly-pushing pants. They come in fun colors and patterns, protect knees while crawling, grow WITH your child for years and years, and also come in summer weights. Although I do have a few pairs of the BABY LEGS brand, most of mine came from sellers such as Crawler Covers on Etsy.com. I lovelovelove me some Etsy!

One-Pieces (footless pajamas) (RE)
Abby models her Carter's fleece one-piece:

Abby AND her BFF wear them!

AH, pants. I swoon at adorable baby jeans and cute tiny capris. Alas, Abby can't really wear pants because they put pressure on her belly. NOT GOOD for a reflux baby! These adorable pajamas from Old Navy were perfect for our little fashionista: no belly pressure, cute colors, super-comfy, and they could be used for p.j.s OR out on the town running errands. Abby also sported one-pieces from Carters, Gymboree, Baby Gap, and The Children's Place. They looked like little outfits once you put on some cute socks and shoes!

Trumpette socks (*)

Out of all of Abby's outfits, these little socks get the most compliments. We wear them with everything, including her pulsox in the NICU. Not only are they adorable, but they actually STAY ON! AMAZING!

Entertainment: Toys, Music, and Movies

DVDs: (*)

After reading article after article citing how watching television is terrible for brain development, I vowed to use it as little as possible. I would never judge another parent for letting their child watch t.v., however I knew for a brain-injury baby like Abby every brain cell mattered. I would only let her watch a teeny bit of t.v. on the random rainy Friday afternoon when I simply could not cope any longer or when I needed to shower and she’d cry when left alone in the Pack and Play unless distracted by the television. BUT THEN we went to Hershey, and my t.v.-free dreams were shattered. We need to use DVDs about 6 times a day to feed her. Sigh. Of course, NOW additional research has come out saying television might not be as harmful as once thought. Like everything else in life, I guess moderation is best. Out of the DVDs we used, here are a few favorites that I hope do as little damage to her brain as possible (plus, she LOVES them! Who’s to argue with that?):

Abby in Wonderland

Curious Buddies: Look and Listen at the Park and Let's Go to the Farm

Jack’s Big Music Show (I absolutely LOVE this series!)

WonderPets

Laurie Berker CDs (*):

The first 10 months of Abby’s life were full of feeds that took HOURS. And after being fed, we needed to keep her upright for at least 30 minutes. Our days were dark and tedious, until a few Laurie Berkner CDs arrived in the mail from a friend. Suddenly, we had a soundtrack to our life! The songs were fun, catchy, and Abby really responded to them. I could sing “Doodlebugs” and “Wimoweh” anywhere and Abby would stop crying and smile. Car rides were smoother, feeds went quicker, and we were a lot happier. We have a bunch of great CDs, but Laurie Berkner is at the top of the list for helping ease my depression. Out of the bunch of them, we particularly loved Victor Vito and Whaddaya Think of That.

Books (*)

It goes without saying that as a former school librarian I love books. Despite having hundreds of (well worn) books that I used in the classroom, I hardly had any board books or good copies of classics. Thanks to our friends, family, and TEAM ABBY, we now have oodles of amazing, kid-approved board books! I couldn’t have gotten through our first year without them, as these books kept her entertained during her many tube feeds. We have SO MANY awesome books, it is hard to choose any to highlight. I literally would have a list of 100 books. So, I chose a few that Abby could “read” again and again and again no matter how fussy she was that day:

Goodnight Gorilla by Peggy Rathman
Bathtime Peekaboo (and Bedtime Peekaboo)
Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown
Any Spot book that has flaps (Where's Spot?, Spot’s first Walk, etc.)
Any flap book, really

Fisher Price Sing Along Stage (*)

If I could give an award for the BEST TOY EVER, this might win it. Once Abby could sit up, feeding her on the pump became a game of attempting to distract her before she climbed out of her chair or started sobbing. Once we got this, I’d plop her in front of the singing stage and let her go! She learned to pull up using the stage, and even now that she’s crawling it’s still a favorite. Babies love the mirrors, the music is fun, little kids pop up when you press the instruments, and it has lights! Oh, and the “microphone” is a rattle, which she loved to play with. I snagged it on sale with free shipping, which made it the best investment ever.

Ball Pit (*)

This is a relatively new addition to our house thanks to my awesome cousin and his family, but already we love it. It is great for Abby because it helps with sensory integration. The balls are perfectly sized… she can fit one in each hand and throws and bangs them together. They look of joy on her face as she dives backward into the pit is priceless. We’ll be using this for years. You could probably make your own for less money with an inflatable pool or Ikea tent and just fill it with balls purchased at Walmart or on Amazon. We love how this one can be folded up for storage if we can pry it out of Abby’s hands!

Wiggly Giggler (*)

This simple toy was great for helping Abby learn to use her hands. Babies can hold it by the middle rod to shake it, or practice their pincher grasp on the ends. It makes a sqeaking noise when shaken, and Abby loved that! In fact, this accompanied us on many doctor trips to keep her smiling. Also, it’s easy to wipe off and the price (about $4 or $5) can’t be beat!

O Ball (*)

Another great toy for all babies, especially young ones as they learn to grip and shake things. Abby was in awe of this one until we lost it. I’m keeping my eyes open for another, because I think this is the kind of toy that grows with you and can be used on many levels!

Sophie the Giraffe (*)

Technically this is a ridiculously expensive teething toy, but I do have to say we love it. First of all, it’s easy to wash so it’s perfect for trips to the doctor’s office because if it drops on the floor I just wipe it off—no toy quarantine like most of her dropped toys! It’s made of natural rubber and food-based paint, so it’s safe to chew. It’s also easy to hold and has lots of nooks for chewing. The teethers that you put in the fridge are fine, but Abby typically chews on them for a minute and then tosses them on the floor. I can count on Sophie to provide much longer “chew time” than that!

What am I missing? I KNOW you have some great products to add to the list! Please feel free to leave comments with critiques of my list, ideas, and questions. What products help YOU get through the day?

"To Do" and "Thank You"

2009-06-27T10:03:00.000-04:00

First and foremost, THANK YOU for the donations that have been arriving! We were able to fund a major portion of a dream trip for a family who really, really deserved it. The smiles on the girls' faces were worth a million dollars. Actually, they were priceless. Thank you for making that dream come true for one amazing family. Our current mission is to support families facing difficult times due to medical problems. This dream perfectly fit the bill of showing how a little bit of money, when put toward a good cause, can change lives for the better.

Planning Abby's 1st birthday party has taken up most of my free time, and so I've been compiling my to-do list toward setting up the charity and will hopefully get to tackle it after the party. I want to keep you informed on my progress, so you know where your donations will going and why they are important. On my current to-do list are the following:

::: Set up the charity with official 501(c)(3) tax-exempt status. I hope to do this before the end of the tax year. If anyone is knowledgeable in this area and would like to help, please let me know!!!

::: Once this is done, I can create a bank account for the charity to keep it as transparent as possible. Right now all the donations are filtered through us, and I know I'm honest but I want to be sure our donors know that, too. :-)

::: "Brand" the TEAM ABBY name. This includes a logo, slogan, color scheme, and website. Again, if you have any great ideas in this area share the love and let me know! Even if you have an idea for the logo or are willing to brainstorm one, I'd appreciate the creative juices I know are flowing throughout the TEAM ABBY community.

::: Create a more solidified mission. As I browse other charities like Abby's, it's obvious what their mission is. Some examples are a charity that purchases 5-point harness booster seats for low-income families (http://www.kyledavidmiller.org/) or funds nights in the Parker House for families with a CDH child (www.theparkerreesefoundation.com). For Abby, it's hard to pinpoint a cause to focus on. Our lives were changed (for better or worse) because of vasa previa, head cooling, kidney disease, blood donations, feeding issues, GERD, nursing care, medical supplies, advocacy with insurance companies... the list is endless. The one thing that ties them all together is the support we received each step of the way. That's why I keep coming back to supporting other families... the question is, what's the most tangible way to do that? Any ideas, folks?

::: Create a schedule of upcoming fundraisers. I have lots of ideas, but need to focus on the ones that can get "the most bang for our buck". And by buck, I mean "time". Which will require the least amount of work for the most money raised?

::: Post articles that help families such as ours. My first one will be a NICU Survival Guide for families. Other topics: how to support a NICU family, helpful tips for what to do when your child comes home, tips for hospital stays with children, ideas for helping a baby with reflux, etc. Of course I'll need input from those who have also faced these situations, so if you have ideas for the first article (NICU Survival Guide) please email them to me!

That's enough To-Dos for now, although of course I have more. Thank you, once again, for your donations and helping fund the dreams and needs of families facing seemingly insurmountable situations connected to medical needs. If you can't help monetarily now, is there anything on our to-do list that tickled your fancy? If so, let me know-- either post a comment or email me carrie {dot} higgins {at} gmail {dot} com!!!

In Honor of Steve

2009-03-18T23:06:00.000-04:00

The first Dream we are funding is a very, very special one involving a family I adore. I first met Liz as a colleague, but she left teaching to raise her two daughters (now 7 and 10) whom she and her husband Steve adopted as toddlers from Sierra Leone. While I have never met Steve, I had heard many stories of his humor, love of life, kindness, and most of all how he was an amazing and loving father.

This August, Steve was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive form of cancer. He passed away just 5 months later, right before Christmas-- leaving the wife and daughters he cherished so much. Despite the pain he felt daily, he never complained. Instead, he snuggled with the girls, sang with them, loved them, and apologized to his wife that he had to leave. They had such a short amount of time to prepare for the inevitable, and when it came they were left with a deep hole.

I can't begin to comprehend how this family is facing the rest of their lives without Steve. We felt so helpless, because how do you begin to comfort a family that has lost so much? Despite that feeling, Casey and I do know that just when things were darkest for us somehow a check would arrive to help with expenses, or a note of encouragement, or a meal to feed us. After talking with Liz, what this family needs right now is a chance to get away for a week and laugh, cry, and make new memories in a beautiful place.

So the first Dream we are granting from the TEAM ABBY project is a vacation for the family. It will not be easy for Liz to go on vacation without her beloved Steve, but the girls are so excited for a chance to swim and see dolphins and ride the waterslides. I know he is waiting to see them all smile again.

If you would like to help make this dream happen, please email me as soon as possible (carrie.higgins@gmail.com) with a pledge. We have committed to giving this family money to cover 2/3 of the cost of this special vacation. Any amount of money is welcome, whether it is $5, $25 or $500. If you would like to "sponsor" a specific piece of the trip, please see the list below and email me what you would like to cover. To some, a vacation might seem like a "want" versus a "need". Those who have been through a devastating event such as this know that this is very much a "need", the need to begin rebuilding your life and finding spots of happiness through the haze of grief. Liz thanks you, her daughters thank you, I'm sure Steve is thanking you, and of course we are so thankful for you. If you are unable to give at this time, we will have other dreams (large and small) posted as they come up.

Vacation Sponsorship:
shuttle voucher to the resort: $23 (3 sponsorships available)
one day of meals per person: $39 (15 sponsorships available)
activity voucher (such as dolphin encounter): $50 (three sponsorships available)
accommodations per person: $111 (15 sponsorships available)
flight: $300 (three sponsorships available)

Again, any amount is appreciated. No amount is too small (or, too big!)
Lots of love,
Carrie, Casey, and Abby

Mission Statement

2009-03-18T19:50:00.000-04:00

Our mission for the TEAM ABBY charity project is a simple one. At this moment in time, we hope to grant "Dreams" that can positively and profoundly impact the experience of another person or family. This might be something big, such as sending a grieving family on a well deserved vacation, something smaller such as providing items like books and blankets to give solace to a family whose child is in the NICU, or something far-reaching such as organizing a blood drive to help hundreds of people receive life-giving blood.

At this time, we have a few "Dreams" underway. We hope to formally found the TEAM ABBY Foundation in the future once we have a little free time. In the meantime, we are still pushing forward by helping fund a few Dreams for some very special people.